Obviously, Rutgers pays its female guest speakers according to cup size.

If this had happened in the U.K., the headlines would all be about “knicked knickers.”

Trump fears women more than he does federal prosecutors.

Amen.

The mayor’s envelope from the Mob must have been a little light last month.

Yes, and there’s a whole set of anecdotes I could tell, too. But most of them come down to the fact that several years ago, I met with a large group of people who owned a whole lot of guns, which, to state the obvious, means they had a whole lot of money invested those guns. And these were low-income people, many of…

Freudian interpretation: When a man gives a woman an engagement ring, it symbolizes him gifting his fiancé with his testicles (“stones”). That’s why the amount of money he spends on the ring is so significant—it represents the value that he and his fiancé place on his manhood. If the fiancé/wife loses her…

I grew up in that same religious environment, and I can tell you that it’s a mindset that says that there is never a resolution to any problem, or even any issue, whether social, financial, medical, political, or whatever. I never met a single human being in that environment who was truly happy, and I met so many who…

“Name a rubber, a blubber, and a ‘hubber.”

I saw a short clip of Trump’s speech about drugs today. The most insane thing he said was this (paraphrasing a little, but not much): “In seven years, when I leave office, I don’t want this problem to still be here.” Can you believe that shit? He believes he’s going to be reelected in 2020!

You obviously have a weakness for the classics.

Then he had the gall to invite the victims to sit with him so he could have an “open conversation.”

I guess Andrew Dice Clay was already booked somewhere else?

I doubt it. The evil people never die when we need them to. See Shah of Iran, Ayatollah Khomeini.

Agreed, plus, in the text above, Comey calls it a “leadership book.” What the hell is that, anyway?

Which was Dianetics, by L. Ron Hubbard.

“They should make the whole school out of books!” Some dumbass standup comedian.

War and Peace could stop a bullet, but probably wouldn’t want to.

He sounds a lot like this yank I know of named “Bernie.”

I may be late to the party with this question, but are there any African-American Scientologists?