(blows into harmonica, key of D flat major)

@smmo: But should the size of a couple's bank account really determine their attitude about infidelity?

It's interesting how quite a few footballers, through their off-the-pitch personae and shenanigans, publicly manifest their sense of entitlement in a way that makes them seem untouchable (insert Kanye's "Can't Tell Me Nothing" here). Yet, around these seemingly relentless women, they paint themselves as helpless…

@kepster: Amber Gates is in full agreement.

@rd2uk: She did, in fact, state that Suri made her wear those blue shoes.

Frank Robinson is sad that you left him out.

@victoriasauce: He works like Tinker Bell. As long as you believe in him with all your libido, he will continue to exist.

@junani: Word is some footballers have their lawyers file for "super-injunctions" to silence the press regarding details in their private lives. It's basically a gag order on the basis of privacy invasion.

The still for the bottom video looks like something from The Real Housewives of Bon Temps.

@biancajames: The fact that he wants to meet his potential housekeepers at a coffee shop says to me that even if his request is fairly innocuous in nature (if not rife with the markings of a douchelord), he still probably wants to visually approve of them. He doesn't want to risk an agency sending him someone who's…

"The reunion was Danielle's last appearance on The Real Housewives of New Jersey."

@HelloKitty: The horse, of course. He's the real star of the show.

@HelloKitty: The horse, of course. He's the real star of the show.

@HelloKitty: Diva's not impressed with the model's copycat hairstyle.

@HelloKitty: Diva's not impressed with the model's copycat hairstyle.

This is the face of someone who'd be jealous of your business card's subtle off-white coloring. Personally, I'd cut my losses.

@notsodarling: Can't. Look. Away.

Also, AJ, the Joan Jett & the Blackhearts version is better. All of the awesomeness, none of the "One Night in Bangkok" implications.

@Blaise Astra Parker: Now that's the Cabbage Patch at its finest.

@yourestillinadream: My dream is to one day be amongst a throng of True Blood fans, holding up an "Earth to Meekus" sign. I think it would get ASkars' attention.