The Giuseppe Tornatore film version is better than the source material in every conceivable way.

Mama doesn't even bother to get out the old squeeze box anymore, just keeps it in an old wardrobe behind some scrapbooking supplies.

But an entire album about cactus would prove to be a bridge too far for The Pixies.

"You're an angry young man, I can tell."

But as it's an underground revolution, that's to be expected, isn't it?

Randy Quaid's movie Parents is becoming a rock opera?

So Ed Brubaker's Deadenders, then?

He was Dr. Paul Entmann?

Han always shoots first, but he's trying this new desensitizing gel and has high hopes for future improvement.

Everybody of a certain age knows that - it was described in great detail in "The Starr Report", which can be purchased from Amazon or B&N as part of the "Great Witch-Hunts of the 90s E-book Bundle" (also includes "Satanic Panic Funtime Follies" and "Franklin Credit Union, You Loved Neither Wisely Nor Too Well").

Aren't we only allowed to speak about that series reverentially and in hushed tones?

It's something from an early Jonathan Creek episode that involves couches and sneaking around an office.

Together with the aliens known as "Station"?

They're hoping to make it a Marvel-styled shared universe with Moonrunners, the 1970s movie that the Dukes of Hazzard was based on, mostly to incorporate the goofy dynamite arrows.

"The Shaq Cubed" could be filmed in Canda, to keep down the cost of the possibly-alien-built series of linked deathtraps that guests would be navigating throughout the show, with discussion breaks in each chamber. Wesley Snipes could appear in a sidekick/announcer role to pump up the viewers at home with his trademark…

He does, He's just really repressed.

Shack VIII: If The Shack Is A Rockin', Then There Might Be A Funnel Cloud Nearby And This Structure Is Unlikely To Provide Adequate Shelter - The Musical, Y'All!

Melissa Strickland almost had a lock on this, but the fire helped put paid to those plans.

"I guess we should have known when that guy named Jonah sold us this gigantic Chrysler that we'd never make it to the love getaway we'd hoped for… but this rapprochement with a loving yet strangely cruel God is almost as good! And now I can add cock-blocked by The Lord to my facebook profile!"

Does this mean that Chaka Khan's "Feel for You" has been leading our impressionable middle-aged citizenry on the path to Hell for decades, as they've been worshiping at the altar of a false idol all this time?