If only it'd been a Muppet production, Whoopi could've three-peated.

But will this movie showcase the doctrine of shooting someone just for snoring too loud?

The silent partner in Barlow and Straker Antiques, he was. At least, according to old man Hooper.

But it turned out Dalton Wilcox was right all along! Or was that non-canonical?

"He was saying something about reigning in blood and a goat with a thousand eyes or thousand young or suchlike. I just thought he was big into Slayer and Lovecraftian abominations, is all."

You can always return the unused portion, that way.

He was pretty darn good in the 70s movie version of The Great Gatsby.

Yes, and the movie will be called Red Planet Mars. Peter Graves will, unsurprisingly, not appear.

Wasn't that ass shot the original album cover for "Songs from the Big Chair"?

Does that mean we don't need Tab Hunter anymore, now that we've found it?

That's right, she's The Doctor's brother, has an extensive collection of antiquities and was a cardinal in Gallifrey's Time Lord government.

It's so bizarre to think Boorman wanted Burt Reynolds to star in that, originally. Although maybe he would have been a better sport about the wedding dress scene.

"It's the delicious testicular torsion I never knew I needed! Thanks, doc!"

A whole fried chicken wearing a tiny hat with the price tag still attached? Sounds delicious!

There's always the old SCTV Bob's Big Boy skit with John Candy going from table to table asking people if they're going to finish their meals, and if not, finishing them himself.

Yep, that's about right.

Nostalgia for all the HoJo's references in early MST3K episodes?

And then there are the Leopards - the chocolate chip Twinkies. They're not really that much better, but when you've decided to chuck it all, never have sex again, and take that long buttery slide to morbid obesity, a change is as good as a rest.

And that's how Ted Cruz met Jeff Roe.

These pipes are clean?