You want some Arby's too?

TUSK!

This is the first time Twitter has made me smile.

Look at me, I'm Davy Crockett!

"Ah, fresh victims for my ever growing army of the undead."
"Sir, you have to let go of the button. "
"Oh, son of a bitch"

I love the satirical version, When You Someone the It Eats?

J'accuse!

Huh, what does the sugar industry have against turtles?

I think wanting to be an exception is something lots of people like. I know I enjoy it. I prefer to be the weirdo amongst normal people, and the normal person amongst weirdos.

At a higher altitude isn't quite the same thing.

Ugh, those things are such a pain in the ass. I've had to use them, but I've never been happy about it.

I'd watch that, out of morbid curiosity.

I prefer the pretzels.

I'm no scientician or anything, but you have kinda a catch-22 going on there that I hope you somehow solve or get help with.

Yeah, agreed.

Wait, cupcake is an insult? I like cupcakes. :(

I agree, although I think that many people will, *after* falling in love and being together for a while, still love you if you get your face burned off by a alligator with a blowtorch.

Extensive snopes research on the topic linked below, which in the end isn't conclusive but leans towards 'yeah, it probably actually happened'.

when you someone egg it?

The folks at DARPA saw one of those 'Shut down the internet, so-and-so won it with this meme of cats' posts and took it literally.