GOOD. Anyone using a selfie stick should be beaten senseless with their own selfie stick.

Like I needed another reason not to eat at crappy chain restaurants. Fuck the people who own and run Darden, and the consumers who spend their money at their awful food mills.

You just know that this is going to be craptacular! Let the schadenfreude begin!!

Undoubtedly one of the most vapid conversations in the history of humanity.

Here's the Yelp page for his restaurant. Let him have it!

When I saw the after picture I worried that Christine had developed jaundice.

I have received many hundreds of those calls, from spoofed numbers from all over the country. I used to fuck with them; giving them fake credit card numbers, names, addresses etc. That only seemed to increase the number of calls that I received. I no longer answer calls from any long distance numbers that I don't…

Exactly. Anyway if nukes do start flying the resulting radioactivity will kill everyone in Denmark anyway so this development is NBD.

Hate The Drake.

Awww, are you the teen who got the nuked burger? Sucks to be you.

You can't say 'Chop Chop' without sounding like Judge Smails

Chernobyl Guacamole.

I prefer to use "Macht schnell!". I used to jokingly say Chop Chop! to my wife, but I got tired of her punching me after I said it.

I hate myself for finding her so f%@#ng hot. Crazy and hot.

W.C. Fields put it best:

JESUS WEPT.

FYI: I've been selling wines and spirits for almost 20 years. When a restaurant is 'out of most of their wine list' it's because they are hurting for money. In fact, it's usually a sign that a restaurant is on its last leg.

His Helmet 'O Fake Hair was designed by the same guy who made Darth Vader's helmet.