You make living sound like it sucks.

the GOP let the horse out of the barn a long time ago but only now is closing the doors. Except it wasn’t really a horse, but a mangy goat covered in rotten marmalade who thinks he’s a unicorn.

Of course he’s full of shit, every single thing he says is a stupid lie. He’ll never debate Clinton in any kind of real neutral setting, he’ll only do it if he can arrange for a moronic circus scene full of screeching idiots who roar over his spastic twitching and dopey insults. He’s a grade-A coward, a sleazy punk, a…

I was going to call it “Sword in the Snatch” but the connotations were...painful.

Sorry, but I’m an Arthurian whore. I will be there for Lock Stock & Two Swinging Swords or Snatch Excalibur.

How is that not the last thing you check before you go on stage at a massive televised event? I always have the same list of checks before something important: 1. Nothing in nose 2. Nothing in teeth 3. Boobs not escaping from shirt 4. Fly is up/skirt isn’t tucked into underwear.

Lord I know I’m white, but please don’t ever let me be this white.

Won’t somebody please think of the fucking children.

I wonder if they will give Roethlisberger a pass on going into women’s restrooms to rape the shit out of them. Or does that only apply in Georgia.

A racist, a cheater, a misogynist, and a douchebag walks into a bar. Bartender says, “Sorry, Mr. Trump, we’re closed.”

A deflator, a rapist, and a fraud. They represent the GOP well.

The reason we keep getting mindless summer blockbusters is because you (and everyone else) keep going to every single one. If you want better movies, you need to stop supporting bad ones. Hollywood will do whatever we pay them to do.

Can’t wait to not be able to take public transit and brave the busiest interchange in the south and not find parking to overpay to see one of the most dismal teams in MLB history while sitting next to a bunch of old money assholes with funny sounding voices. But at least I won’t have to see black people out the window…

Just let all the rec-league softball teams that used to use the parks, play instead at the new stadium. Braves fans would appreciate the upgrade in the quality of play actually.

No part of me is surprised that Paul Bethany is a douchebag. So much talent with so little career when you’re that British, white, and male?

I love it when guys defend other guys by talking about *their* own friendship as evidence for why the guy must not have beaten his female partner. It’s like white guys saying “my white friend has always been great to me, there’s no way he’s racist!!”

For the curious... This is how the election of ‘96 went.

Make America Narf! Again

10) Pinky becomes President of the United States…

“Hermione’s white face”