You've lost me, is there a direct link between the two that I'm missing?

I think you're probably stretching the definition of satire a little too much.

Yup, someone walks 500 miles, and another person sends a letter from America.

He's already played Keith Richards too.

I don't really know why, as I'm not a Godzilla fan as such, but I'm stupidly excited for this film (I didn't like Monsters either).

So what, we're all just going to ignore 'Keyboard, you octave more sense than that'?

You guys are saying 'sexy Cate Blanchett' like there's such a thing as Cate Blanchett not being sexy.

I don't know, but imagine how much easier it would be to cast the first (movie version of) Nathan Drake, than cast the second Indiana Jones.

It wouldn't be that hard to make an Indy film that's better than Crystal Skull, but you'll never make one that's better than Raiders, so why commit to it long term? No-one that loves any of the first three will ever love any future films like they love those ones. And everyone that loves them will show Raiders to…

Life would be much better if they just left Indiana Jones alone and somehow managed to make a great series of Uncharted films. Let Nathan Drake replace Indiana Jones, instead of someone younger replacing Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones.

That's the problem Crystal Skull was always going to have, being compared with the first three. It was always going to fail, it had no chance of being better.

There was a moment at the end of the film when I thought Indy was about to go into space on the alien ship, and I was briefly enraged by the idea. I would have tweeted angrily every day since seeing it if that had happened.

I absolutely love Raiders, Temple of Doom and Last Crusade, and I don't care that those things I listed are ridiculous.

3 people falling out of a plane on an inflatable lifeboat and surviving.

I'll defend Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, so I'd give another Indy film with Harrison Ford a chance, but future films without him will be on my 'will never watch or acknowledge' list.

Hey guys, there's still a good chance that Judgment Day happens before this shit airs, right?

Top Gun's just not a film that you can get an actual sequel from is it? What's going to happen, Maverick's son gets killed and he gets revenge, in a cool jet? Why not just remake it?

The film was still running at the London Premiere when the news was announced, apparently Idris Elba announced it to the audience at the end of the film.

I'll always remember Nelson Mandela as the guy from The Wire.

That definitely ranked high on the guffawmeter.