10. Getting hit by a bus

+1 Casa de Fruta Stadium

“huggable coach Bill Belichick” - *snort*

Bravo. If you had worked “Paraag Marathe” into the rhyme scheme, we might be talking Nobel Prize.

Don’t cricket stans exist specifically because the imperialists won?

That is a wicked googly you have there.

Hey man, when we can’t dunk on Cricket stans, the imperialists have won.

Detroit, because they are probably the largest city without a professional football team.

Dear John,

You mean he’s not a pillar of the headhunting coaches community?

This is the best written take on AB I've read so far. Also, I'm putting $100 bucks on your Browns Jets score being accurate.

It is in there, you should’ve kept reading...

I searched the web to see if they even sell those phones anymore and it looks like they’ve been converted to wireless speakers... courtesy of Rob Gronkowski.

I don’t know where you quit reading the article, but there are three paragraphs that talk about this. The first paragraph (which also includes a link!) is the one starting with “Okay, okay, I’ll stop.”

How many times have I fought beside you, Gyro? And this is how you repay me!?

The Sports Illustrated football phone ad was like five times better than any of the three contemporary ads. Why can’t advertising stick to tried and true methods like forcing “normal” people to be irrationally excited by really dumb things?

I knew it, I’m surrounded by assholes!

How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?

“Even in 2019, it is possible to be surprised by the extent to which our technology, media, and culture are hard-wired to make us look at assholes.”