You are a fucking child.

Violent white supremacist rally? Some of them are very fine people. Black athlete kneels during the national anthem? Fire the son of a bitch.

Nevermind Cancer. You tend to kill slowly and with modern medicine and a lot of money can be fought of for years.

Too slow. We should be praying to the gods of heart attacks and strokes.

Cancer, I know you’re busy. But if you could take time out of your schedule and go get this dumb motherfucker, the whole world would be on your side for once.

He says football isn’t violent enough the day after Aaron Hernandez’s CTE scan shows he was one level away from dementia. He just steps in shit over and over and over....

the writers are failing him - it’s not for a lack of talent.

KJ Apa is not the most obviously outstandingly talented member of the Riverdale cast, but he grew on me. He is committed—in the scene where he repeatedly punches the frozen lake to try to rescue Cheryl he actually broke his hand.

Just because I want Archie to stop singing doesn’t mean I want Archie injured. Stay safe, kids.

You could ask that gutless fuck, The Big Shoe, above. He certainly knows.

Ah, so you think making fun of your dumb comment is equal to women being doxxed.

Oh, jesus. How many sad MRA groups are you a member of?

Block & Tackle will be backle. Once the show goes on hiatus in November, the column will start up again. I also plan to offer it as an upcoming bribe if this little stunt works tonight.

I don’t want them to Stop watching. I want them to keep handing over their ad dollars so that we can keep hiring women and minorities and we can keep infuriating these dumb fucks

And the only thing I can say is if you’re lucky enough to make a show that is really good that people like, that means some bad people are going to like it too.

I’m based in the UK and can’t watch it, but I knocked up this pic and hopefully it’ll fool your tv overlords John.

I am very good at dealing with catastrophes. I never freak out, I’m calm, focused, productive. But I will lose my shit if I can’t get a goddamn stapler to staple. Because it’s not frustrating if the big things go wrong. The frustration happens when the little things, which should always work, don’t.

Also of note for cord cutters.. Amazon Video has the old episodes.

Also also of note, the show is delightful and I find it pairs well with a nice sour beer while preparing a stew in the crockpot.

I would gladly do this if the bribe was for Block & Tackle. And if Comcast carried Fusion. Since neither of those (mostly the second one) are true, I am truly sorry that I can’t participate. I do hope to watch someday, because John Teti is a delightful individual.

Instead of writing something for us, can you just focus and keep on doing what you’re doing, because you’re amazing at it?