Sir, this is our most... modestly-priced receptacle.

Now that’s just disre2pectful.

*KiñjaÑiñja

I can’t wait tilde next time they meet

Forget all that nonsense. The most important question is: Why doesn’t THE FREAK have his own column on Deadspin?

Carry on to Hayward, son. There’ll be peace when you are done. Drop the flaps to 35. Don’t you fly no more.

Also another racist way to say they are “dummies”.

100% “something they are unable to define” is a construction that trump would never, ever use.

Isn’t the job description of PGA of America professionals literally to deal with hackers?

The PGA’s cybersecurity firm, Porterhouse Solutions, has been ordered to “Buff out these hacks, CHOP CHOP!!”

The Warriors blew a 3-1 lead in the finals.

the judge should order them to tweet “croatoan” and delete the account 

He’s all right now, but last week he was in rough shape.

Looks good on you, though!

What Drew said the other day is soooo true. The way to really not give a fuck about the NFL anymore is to have your team win it all.

US rally, Euro style:

I said he munsoned the mount, not the landing.

I still chuckle at this, too:

Camp in a Tesla that was built in a tent.  Makes sense to me.