And I’m here to say, “fuck you for assuming that the people are the train are so racist that they threw a group of black people off the train for no reason whatsoever.”

Am I the only person left alive who thinks it is okay to come away from an event/experience with just memories and a sense of satisfaction for having enjoyed something?

everyone laughed, sure the 70-year old con was just out for the publicity. With his hernia reaching massive proportions, he’d be lucky to make a half mile even without pursuit.

brb never sleeping ever again

I read “The Da Vinci Fart” in the middle of a meeting and I had an involuntary spit-cackle-spasm that I tried to cover up with a cough and it led into an entire conversation about my seasonal allergies, I don’t even have seasonal allergies

I UNDERSTOOD THAT REFERENCE!

Haha! I know, but I also cry at the Budweiser commercials with the Clydesdales and the golden retrievers. So I guess I’m just a weirdo!

GWB: Selma's the gal that wouldn't get off the bus, right?

Thinking about Richard III makes me think about The White Queen miniseries on Starz, which makes me think about Max Irons, which makes me happy. I went from mass grave to happy in less than five steps. I'm a monster.

That's not unusual. Sometimes it makes sense for a large, expensive apartment community to designate a few units as section 8 housing, for tax purposes and whatnot. The snooty folks paying thousands per month for their apartments are NOT happy once they find out some of their neighbors are mooching off Uncle Sam,…

TheCasualEnthusiast - St. Louis, MO

Speaking of kids and underwear, when I was in kindergarten I had a HUGE crush on my older brother's best friend Sam, a sexy older man in the 4th grade. Every day after school, after Sam and my bro locked themselves in his bedroom to avoid me, I would slide my Little Mermaid panties, one by one, underneath the door. …

Oh god. I was six or seven when 'Achy Breaky Heart' came out. My grandparents had a camper in a permanent lot on the Ohio River (on the West Virginia side, thank you very much), one of those campgrounds where you leave your camper year-round and can build porches for them if you wish. That summer, the spot next to…