Either way, you are too pure for this mean and measly world.

Then stay gold, Ponyboy.

Have we learned nothing from TLC? 

Damn, Sony is getting morbed so hard at the box office.

That’ll do a prequel: Tracksuit Heist.

Ease up, dude. You haven’t gotten distribution yet for your last movie.

You know these guys mean business because they’re heisting money, not the Mona Lisa or some dumb crap like that.

Yeah, her career is over, too, AND she’s hopelessly in debt between the legal fees and the $15 million she now owes to her drunken rapist ex-husband.

Look everybody, it’s the new AV Club copy editor.

Or Wilson Phillips.

In the X-rated cut, Morbius strips.

Hey buddy, clone lives matter.

Do the Jedi wait outside for over an hour while Anakin rampages in the nursery? If not, maybe Kathleen Kennedy would like to hear my pitch for True Detective: Coruscant Nights?

“Morbius 2 can’t hurt you. It’s not real.”

Seth McFarlane’s just punching the time clock at Family Guy HQ, saying “Look, guys, I just work here.”

He had nothing to do with it? Surely as the creator of the show and the actor who portrays two of the main characters, he has some say in what the show is like, even if he doesn’t have a hand in the writing now.

DEEP IN THE HUNDRED ACRE WOOD

Jim Spanfeller is pivoting to video so hard he’s liable to break a hip.

Garfield doesn’t like lasagna anymore. He’s normal now.

Man, look at that pic. Is Green angling for the lead role in The Steve Bannon Story?