Yo if we are all looking for someone to blame, we have each other to blame. What kinda fucked up system has us on the edge of our God damn seats about the health of an 80-something-year-old-woman? That’s some stupid shit to prop up. Objectively, she never should have had that position, whether she dipped during Obama…

We’re all worried, fam.

“Sex and Candy!”

“Stick is candy!”

“We are doing our jobs, enforcing the laws passed by Congress.”

This is the fucking worst. They’re doing it. They’re killing Deadspin.

I definitely picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue, I can tell you that much

no booze is fine, you are right. What is not fine is making people wear heels and then pay for booze. That is rude

Counterpoint, having been to many Methodist weddings (meaning, no booze at all), is no booze at a wedding is PERFECTLY fine.

Well whatever you want to call it, it looks fantastic on all of you.  Keep up the good work and know that we all support your sartorial decisions.

Please do not disparage my good blog. All regular blogs are Just Look Nice; blogs in the feature format are Very Fancy.

You guys are awesome. It is not hyperbole to say that this site often gets me through the day. Keep up the good work, and for the love of god do not stick to sports.

the proper dress code for running a blog is Just Look Nice, thank you for asking. 

Seeing as how the dress code for the site right now seems to be “Fuck You”, would that be “Very Fancy” or “Just Post Something That Looks Nice”?

Your grandfather was correct. And most athletes have Very Fancy weddings because they are rich, you are correct. 

I feel like venture capitalists would consider theft a sport, right?

This is so ridiculous. Everybody knows these jokes refer to the very real fact that high calorie/high sugar foods are a major cause of obesity, which in turn is a major risk factor for Type 2 diabetes. I’m willing to bet most people with T1, which is genetic disease they had no control over, understand that these…

My. God.

That’s pretty much the reason: he went to Duke.