I honestly thought the same until I had a kid. Now, I like the guy. He’s cute, he’s easy going, he gets me preferential boarding onto airplane and attention from flight attendants. No guarantee that it’ll hold up, but at this point I’d rather have my son than not.

They probably shouldn’t flex Romo. Somebody flexing Romo is why Dak Prescott is a starting QB right now.

The X Type was awkward from every angle. Like an XJ that was left in the dryer too long and shrank unevenly.

Man, he must fucking hate Barron. That little bastard ain’t graduated from shit.

Bleh. BB and Brady don’t really make it easy for Patriots fans in off-field matters, man. I guess it’s fortunate for me that I’ve never once given a single shit what athletes or celebrities think politically, but I wish I could like those two as people more than I do as a Pats fan.

A physical manifestation of the number 69. Just like...a big cardboard cutout of the numbers.

So you’re upset that a 5 cent sticker accomplished the same thing as a recall that would have put thousands of Americans out of work if Ford has gone under, that’s what you’re saying?

It’s actually impressive in a way.

Ford wasn’t bailed out by the government.

Bill Simmons flat out sucks on TV. I’m a Simmons fan, I think he’s one of the best sports writers I’ve ever read, but he’s just not a TV personality. It doesn’t translate for him. Hopefully he’ll see that now like the rest of us do and go back to what he’s great at: writing, and producing sports documentaries.

So a game in early access doesn’t have a perfectly programmed and functioning model of human sexuality and romance? Should we expect it to?

That makes perfect sense. Somebody else told me that the game is gaming the game, which seems to sum it up perfectly. I also appreciate that nobody has given me jerk answers, just well thought out reasoned information. You speedrunners are okay in my book...which y’all would find a way to skip entirely and read in…

You know, I hadn’t thought of it like that. It actually makes a ton more sense that way.

At what point does a speed run stop being the game? Like speedrunners are always trying to skip this part or that part to get to the end faster, right? So if you find a way to glitch the game into rolling the end credits 5 seconds into the game, is that a speed run? If not, why?

He should have made the list, that guy totally sucks.

For some reason, that reminds me of the Guitar Hero episode of South Park. Randy thinks the kids will think it’s cool that he can play guitar since they’re playing Guitar Hero, but they only really care about the game.

I’ll allow it.

I didn’t forget. It’s just that if I made a list of everything that sucks about 2016 I’d have never gotten to my actual point because 2016 fucking sucks.

Look, 2016 sucks for a lot of reasons. Donald Trump, Kardashians, North Korea. But a 40 year old British man can stream a game about driving a truck for 5 hours a week and thousands of people watch it, and that gives me hope.

Soup can, followed by hose clamps.