Artie Fufkin: [after the buff books universally pan the SQ5] You know what I want you to do? Will you do something for me?

Ian Faith: You know what, fuck it, I quit!

Derek Smalls: We're very lucky in the brand in that we have two visionary vehicles, the RS4 and the R8, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of vehicles, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel the SQ5's role in the brand is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like…

Marty DiBergi: "This tasteless crossover is a good indication of the lack of automotive invention within. The engineering growth of the Audi brand cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded 'special editions' and ridiculous pricing."

Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.

Marty DiBergi: Do you feel that marketing an S-line diesel crossover keeps you a child? That is, keeps you in a state of arrested automotive development?

STDi is much, erm, sexier.

This is by far the most awesome thing that's appeared on NPOCP for a long time.

Somehow, as a teenager in the '80s, I never realized that these things had no B-pillars. Probably because I had zero interest in minivans (and approaching 40, that hasn't changed, though this one is at least interesting). With those gaping openings on either side of the body shell, it must have the torsional…

Seconded!

You're safest saying that the stewards have ruled "hard and clear for safety" for the past 8 days, since Grosjean's one-race ban was the first real indication that the stewards are getting serious about cracking down on questionable driving. My reaction to the Grosjean ban was that it was an acceptable decision only…

There is a semi-irrational price premium for unmolested GTs on top of the premium that 242s command over 244s and 245s. Even though they don't really perform better than a non-GT from the same model years, they do have the special interior and grille (and to a lesser extent, wheels and air dam) that many 'brickers…

The Volvo. While I like the Audi Coupe's body, all VW/Audi automatics of that era were like black holes that sucked all of the power and acceleration out of whatever the engine (which in the Coupe's case is a FIVE-cylinder, not a four). The Coupe is also wrong-wheel-drive and likely will be less reliable than the…

Careful, your pocket protector is showing. But in all seriousness, thanks for the education.

Frankly, I don't understand why you keep saying, "Torque doesn't matter." Strictly speaking, torque is the only thing that matters, since horsepower is nothing but a calculation derived from torque.

Well, that explains a lot.

I remember watching that race live on Speedvision and shouting at the TV (something I almost never do) in complete disbelief as car after car was taken out. Pretty much the craziest thing I have ever seen in a race.

Yes, in 1994. 18 years ago.

Considering that a race ban hasn't been handed out for a driving incident in F1 for 18 years, Grosjean's penalty was excessive, especially considering that what Maldonado has done (and done intentionally!) this season has been far worse. That being said, if (and this is a HUGE if) the stewards show some consistency…

He should've bought a Bagheera, the sports car built for a ménage à trois.