Pastor Ellis looks and sounds like how I imagine Martin Lawrence would do a parody of a pastor.

Oh dang they moved from Eastern time zone to Central now and they’re still late :p

No such thing as an ugly dog!  Even the “ugly” contest winners are adorable!

No, no.  That’s fixing health care by attrition.

lol like he actually has a normal “mental state”

Don’t be that gaslighting guy, it’s not a good look

I wish the politicians were as up in arms about kids in schools and people in movie theaters being shot by white American males with military assault rifles as they are about a single white woman being killed by a non-resident person. Either way they are all horrible situations, and I don’t wish that kind of loss of…

No, no it’s not part of every single highway on-ramp.  You must not have ever driven here in SATX.  And even if there was one, it would just give the other driver a reason to be an ass and try and beat you to the sign so they don’t have to yield for you.

Woah...slow down there!

I’m willing to bet none of the “Sharks” would bite on investing in any of these startups.

Even his friend was like man - she’s 10 or 11 and he was all - she doesn’t look 10 or 11

I’m a dad and your statement horrifies me.  I wonder how many of those men that took an interest in you also had daughters?

I thought they tried to trademark the word “candy”, which doesn’t make them any less assholes.

It’s sausage BOB (breakfast-on-a-bun) for me! Plus a fried apple pie.

No.  Don’t assume that.

As in Right, or White?

I wonder how many of those Far-Alt-Right snowflakes realize Trump’s mom was herself an immigrant?  Probably none that would admit to it.

I think they hope to get to the “sponsor” level, ala look at me in a bikini holding some weight loss drink/powder/whatever.

That photo under the headline...if ever the look on a woman’s face made me want to punch her...would I be wrong?

Wouldn’t you know it? When I bought my 65" 4K “Smart” TV last year, they didn’t make “dumb” sets larger than 55". Now they do.  Son of a...