His ass may be sweating, but his head romaines cool.

yet the owners scoffed at the idea of a celery cap.

I dunno, they guy has a point. Free weight areas at the gym are notoriously the territory of strict Buddhist practitioners who have spent years meditating to eliminate the Anatta, or conception of self contained in the ego.

“EST-CE QUE VOUS SOULEVEZ MEME, BRO?”

One of the only books I ever had to stop reading for a while because I was so profoundly uncomfortable--and this was, jeez, at least fifteen years ago--on such a visceral level.

Mom, what happened to Coleman?

No, I mean I’m pretty sure it is still better than Buffalo > Cleveland. 

Had a blast working EVO again this year! 33 hours in three days and loved every minute

I wish I was around for the golden age of automats.

Okay, thanks, I missed the part about the catcher not having the ball, despite it explicitly being contained in the tweet. I’m an idiot (well, idioter, anyway), and carry on.

At the end of the day, we all just root for laundry.

Kevin Cash has done an excellent job with that scrap heap (and Chris Archer) they have down there.

Today is Serap’s birthday, so everybody wish him a happy birthday.

As a parent my first thought was "poop"

Schnatter is the Papa John's Pizza of humans.

Mental health professional here. Thank you for your courage in sharing your story and being brave enough to make an impossibly difficult decision. May your family find healing from this difficult situation. 

now the Cardinals, whose uniforms are the same color as a MAGA hat

I’m obligated to say Fuck Will Leitch here 

“Speak to a professional. Because I’m worried about you and I don’t know how else to help.”