dammit

2. when these showed up in Deadspin’s chatroom, someone at the office shouted, “YOOOOOO, THUMB DEAD?

Based on the less-than-healthy nature of the stools, police are looking for a man afflicted with anal fjords.

I still give the Chinese ability to make snow a greater chance of success than I give Qatar’s open-air air-conditioning technology.

THAT’S GOOD KINJA!

These NFL concussion stories just get sadder and sadder.

Clearly this is all Lt. Frank Drebin’s fault.

Somewhere Leslie Nielsen is smiling.

So Stephen A Smith was right about Brady destroying his phone. This kind of wrecks havoc with my narrative of the Universe.

They do have trees outside of North America you provincial asshat.

“I’m so sick of this fu——- bu——— you c—-.”

The CONCACAF logo really just should be the poop emoji.

It’s fitting that rodeo enthusiasts can only last for 7 seconds.

+1 thgyhgb you magnificent bastard

Chandler: “Could you BE any more of a disappointment?!?!”

Deadliest Catcher

What about motion sickness while playing video games? Anything played in first person makes me super nauseous!

In story with @ramonashelburne we also report Mavs now fear they won’t now get audience with Jordan as Clips have essentially surrounded him.

Visiting hours didn’t begin until 4 PM and Tom Coughlin needed to get to bed

A Buccaneer with a hand injury. VERY ORIGINAL CJ!