The mental image of your “panniers” has me chuckling! That sort of thing is exactly why I stay in big cities.... because you can pull shit like that and nobody bats an eyelash. You could’ve sailed the SS Menstruation down the street on roller-skates while wearing strobe-light antennae and your best inflatable purple…

I should add that I’m a gay man and had never previously bought tampons, so the Director wrote out very specific directions. I would buy eight boxes and the cashier would use packing tape to tape up two bundles of four and create a little handle. As I sailed down the streets of lower Manhattan like the S. S.…

My best friend responded with “ewww, tmi” once when I mentioned I had cramps. I gave him an earful. He has been supportive, understanding and awesome about it since – he told me he felt obligated to act grossed out because that’s what he was “supposed” to do, but realized how dumb and juvenile it was when I called him…