I remember when they used to sell Life Savers' holes in a little tube. Now they just melt them back down to make more Life Savers.

I got on my local bus once and there was a guy wearing a cat tail. I wish the police would have arrested him.

A cable network? But the cable doesn't network. I feel like it's a different category.

Nickelodeon is a cable channel.

A couple of them recently passed. Another is getting into the rubber band business.

Is it racist to ask what flavor the ice cream is?

I'll keep this in mind next time I'm buying bread.

I didn't think anybody had brand loyalty when it came to sliced bread.

Dr. Luke? I remember when it was all about Cool Dr. Money and Cool Dr. Money haircuts.

The Laura Dernaissance begins now.

Let's focus on Wilson, guys.

Chicago is no good?

I wish I was her jeans!

Barron looks like a One Direction kid 'cept for when he's clapping and his hands is going in so many crazy directions!

I always liked that song he sang about his ding a ling.

Calling her by her full name takes away the power of the word.

Women are too self conscious about their knees to wear this.

I hope Jeff Daniels wipes out all of these philistines from the face of the earth!

Does Doug count? I added Doug.

She's too busy selling over-priced cake mix.