Avid traveler on a budget and, sorry, I’m not down with these tips. Ok, that’s wrong: I agree with the last one, particularly since I just got back from a trip to tourist-laden hell— er, Italy.

Meanwhile...

You’re responsible for your own orgasm.

yeah lolwat. she couldn’t come so you dumped her. (general you, cause I know I’m not replying to chain-chomp)

ugh that last sentence has happened and it is sum bullshit. “omg my penis isn’t enough for you?”

Seriously? You ended a relationship over orgasms? Way to make her pleasure all about you, champ.

Partly it’s because gay people have more experience with turn based sex by necessity, and partly because the cultural ideal that is portrayed everywhere as the be all end all of sex is a man and a woman both getting off just from PIV sex.

OMG Ann M. Martin is a serial killer.

“The Goal Posts Came Onto Me!”

Honestly, even putting myself fully in the mindset of the sportball fan that I can be, I have not a single fucking clue what “we don’t need your permission” is supposed to mean as a rallying cry...

It’s not so terrible. When I had any frustrations it was when I felt really close but couldn’t get there. But it still feels good.
I’ve definitely had guys say there was no way I was enjoying it because I wasn’t orgasming, or they would use the amusement park line you did, etc., so I started faking it so I wouldn’t…

Is it so hard to believe? I didn’t have them for a chunk of my sex life but I still enjoyed sex.

And, I mean, if they’d gone with something like “If we ask nicely, maybe you’ll let us score” would have been much more applicable to their football team.

If this were a book cover, though, I would totally read that book.

There were no women in the room. OR, no one listened to the one woman in the room.

Pan pizza inside the pillow case

Why are people so bad at making slogans that aren’t about rape? Does literally no one think about this stuff? I’ve worked at a university and the amount of approval that goes into every word of branding is absurd. I don’t know how this happens.

legitimately thought this was a whale a first glance

“what could we do to make tonight fun for you?”