I think we’re talking about different things. Actually being murdered is worse than actually being laughed at. But we’re talking about the fears. If women have a real fear of being murdered, why compare it to something else except to help that fear gain importance? I think it’s important enough on its own.

The proof’s in the pudding. How many men do you know who make this a priority?

Actually, comparing fears is a way of cowing men into agreeing with you. No doubt I’d rather be laughed at than murdered, but I don’t want anyone to say that my fears aren’t important because someone else is also afraid of something else. That’s not how mutual respect is built.

Well, sometimes you figure out what you’re thinking by talking about it. I don’t like the Atwood quote. I don’t think it does anything positive for women or men. It makes it so that women’s fears are only valid if they can be bigger than a man’s. Is that progress? And it’s not your job to get support from men, but I…

I think I’ve identified my problem with the quote. It puts down men’s fear of being humiliated. It invalidates it. Is there a need to compare fears? You won’t get many men jumping on board by doing that (as evidenced by this thread and so many others).

Occasionally is what does seem to happen. That sucks. I wish it wasn’t the case. I think most every guy wishes it wasn’t the case.

I don’t think it is that telling. I believe there’s a huge fear of domestic violence because that actually happens regularly. I think women, just like men, are usually rational. And I bet most women don’t generalize what would happen to them from the most heinous crime in 25 years. I’ll ask my female friends though…

It’s not about the percentage of women murdered by men, it’s about the absolute number. 2 in 100,000, while terrible, is not much. If women are regularly afraid of men killing them, why do they date men?

The police officer—who deals with violent crime every day—said he hasn’t seen an incident this heinous in 25 years of policing. Why do you feel then that it is an example of how men and women are in general?

Generalizing from this one incident isn’t fair. The police officer said he hasn’t seen such a heinous crime in 25 years of policing. I could just as well pick out Jodi Arias’ crime and say that women share her fears while men do not. It’s, frankly, bullshit, and unfortunately, it perpetuates a paranoid form of…