I’m constantly accused of only using the lizard part of my brain, so it only makes sense that a bunch of lizard people rule the world.

Seems silly to me; your parents named you There Are No Teams, and you turned out all right.

You could say these deals are garbage, but then again, so is the food.

All things considered, purchasing an entire Spanish village for less than $200,000 sounds quite reasonable.

I like how two guys took your joke as a cue for a serious discussion as to whether or not Tebow is a good baseball player.

I’m part of a group that specializes in street races. We work out a lot, party all the time, never work, and call each other “family,” even though we barely know each other. How, do you ask, can we afford such a lavish lifestyle? Easy; we go on high-speed chases to rob semi-haulers, which does so much damage to our…

If this was a true Quattro, the price would be $4444.

There are dozens of us! Dozens!

How ironic that Archa is sold in Phuket, because that’s exactly what I would say after deciding whether or not to drink this swill.

You don’t like it, fine.  You know, if you’re not careful, you’re gonna lose me.

If you have a better way to keep him from wetting the bed, I’m all ears.

How bad of a quarterback do you have to be where even your stretching and handoffs are too atrocious to put into a hype video?

Does anyone have any figures on the sex appeal capacity? I bought a 6S because I thought the s stood for “sexy,” but my results upon whipping it out have been “slim” to “sad.” I’m thinking about switching over to the Razr.

That “HEAR IT FROM RAM’S FANS!” section was incredible. I don’t think one of them is an actual fan of the Rams, just a bunch of people from Los Angeles that are pissed off traffic gets increased on the 405 eight Sundays out the year (which is untrue, by the way, because no one goes to a Rams game).

I’m surprised PETA isn’t up in arms over the fact that you can eat a bunch of animals right out of a box.

It’s twice as funny if you read his comment in a Wisconsin accent.

Which is why the three-point stance will be the next thing to be banned in the not-too-distant future.

Considering that most Project One owners will immediately flip it upon touching the gas pedal, I don’t know how Mercedes is going to enforce this threat.

A lot of people are going to hear about Volvo Mobility and just think they’ve made a car with integrated wheelchair accessibility.

Wow, sounds like they have a real chryses on their hands.