Ciara already tried a Future upgrade; it didn’t take.

Jungle Gym Fever

If you dig back further, you’ll find Schlereth tell Thenextking83, “There’s a reason God didn’t call it the Bering Homosexual.”

“Perfect symmetry” is redundant. It’s like saying “insufferable ESPN personality.”

Hopefully he will come down from the rafters and beat the shit out of Drake.

they had all of recorded human history up until about 2003 to get good at it.

Reached for comment, Kevin Love said, “I can’t really defend his firing. Or the job he did as coach. ...Actually, I can’t defend anything. Please don’t ask me to.”

Right, because no player in Seattle’s history has ever been accused of taunting or lack of class....

That must be the most infuriated she’s been in all her 4 years as a Seahawks fan.

Are Seahawks fans quickly becoming the #BestFansInBaseball of the NFL?

Feast Mode.

He’s reportedly half-thrilled to get the chance to coach Colin Kaepernick.

Whenever the End Times come, we need to make sure we save Antonio Cromartie for re-population purposes.

That is, of course, if they can find her.

The Bills’ sidelines are going to be must-see TV next season.

For some reason I don’t feel like blaming the loss on the only guy who scored points for his team yesterday.

Jeffrey Luhnow...didn’t change his password.

I’ll say what we’re all thinking: Chip Kelly is no Jim Tomsula. No way would I trust Chip Kelly’s lifehacks.