Zombies and lady bits. Isn’t that always the root of societal ills?

Oh, he knows black people exist. At least black men. He’s the type of down-low southern queen that attends confederate-themed parties at night and picks up rough trade on the wrong side of town on early mornings.

Is it lame that I teared up? Because I teared up.

I like pleasure spiked with pain and getting tossed from Lakers games. 

Nope. They are still together, and looking even more alike than ever now that Joe is sporting a beard.  

Karlie Kloss Kushner.

All Men Are Ugly. Bald heads, skeevy eyes, manboobs, big guts, tiny dicks, low I.Q., big mouths, hairy backs, zero cleanliness, filthy habits, big baby tantrums, lazier than a day is long, and needy as fuck. Wait, that’s just you.

Channing Tatum looks like a canned ham with ears.

Thank you.

C’mon man, you know you’re being needlessly hyperbolic.

Does your “fuck ‘em” include the black people and other poc who live there who are hopelessly outnumbered at the polls? Or their kids?

That’s a very small piece of toilet paper for such a large piece of shit.

Bitch.... Michelle O accomplished more in her life BEFORE she became first lady than you and your whole tornado bait trailer trash family have ever even read about. Double Ivy League Graduate. Lawyer. Hospital Administrator. Mother. Go getter. Accomplisher of many things, not the least of which is to be married to a…

There’s a Lin-Manuel Miranda connection, too.

Getting an EGOT is too easy these days. New rules: proposal at Emmys, marriage at Grammys, divorce at Oscars, death at Tonys.

Yeah they’ve been trying to make them a Thing since they were babies. Do you have a sense how Eugenie feels, though? I read a trashy magazine article that claimed she didn’t care that he wasn’t getting a title after their marriage, and that she was “happy to be Mrs Crookshanks.” I thought--that can’t be true! But…

There was Ivanka, a charming huntress

Ohhhhh I would have been kicked out for sure. For trying to crawl over my seat and into his lap. 

As a born and raised Floridian, I can sadly say this information will only help him.