I bet you thought you were super clever when you typed your comment.

Thank you for finding what's probably the only legitimate thing to really clutch pearls about in this!

It's been a thing since 1978. And before, too.

I see nothing wrong with this. next.

Never leave an inebriated friend alone at a bar is for when you go out drinking with a friend and then you get an opportunity to hook up [that you would otherwise jump on], but you realize that means Jessica (who's three sheets to the wind) would have to find her way home on her own. So you do not hook up, or you get…

Jon Stewart's all like...

I really hadn't watched any of her interviews previously, so I thought she seemed cool, but I wasn't in the fan club or anything. When she said, "but then I thought no, you have enough attention"...well, I promise to bring peanut butter blossom cookies (the ones with the hershey kiss on top) to the next meeting, okay?

I knew it, too, it's written right there.

I passed that turkey backstage and I thought for one second about putting it over my head and like running out, but then I thought "Ehhh you have enough attention. Maybe it's time to rest."

Betch here.

Yes, but Ducreaux is Cheekier.

Listen Van Gogh, THIS SHIT IS NOT EMPOWERING

"Young women take selfies because they don't derive their sense of worth from themselves, they rely on others to bestow their self-worth on them — just as they've been taught.

You see? Everything CAN be tacos.

I would love to see him compete in a First Gentleman/First Lady cookie bake off. I imagine he'd just waggle his eyebrows and offer the judge a drink.

Bill Clinton seems like a good guy to be the nation's 'First Gentleman' or whatever, due to his past experience as president and because he's so charming. It'd be fun to have them in the White House—not as a political statement (although I'd be stoked if Hillary ran and won), but just as people. I'd like them as our…

No, no, no! How dare you not suggest Empire's Sexiest Man Alive?