Didn't have an opinion of her either way til I saw her on Ellen being charming and funny and genuinely excited about sloths. I officially love her now.

Having met a sloth in person before I have to say that this is the appropriate response.

While I'm not an ethnic minority, I'm from a very lower-class, blue collar white family, and I can relate to the anti-intellectualism so fucking much. My mother tried to trick me into dropping out of college, and then, when that didn't work, she begged me to quit law school because I was "ruining my chances to Be A…

If the friend was whining about not being able to find a man, MAYBE I could understand writing in because you can only listen to someone bitching for so long before you inform then what's up but it just sounds like she is trying to live life as much as she can.

Really. The first writer can best help by shutting the fuck up about it already.

"My friend tries to score dates with really hot guys."

Makes you wonder if shoplifting was her effort to seek help for whatever else was going on in her life. Maybe sticking her fetus in a bag and making sure someone saw it by using the bag to shoplift was easier than calling someone and saying "this just happened and I have no idea what to do."

Damn, just the other day some work colleagues were standing around the coffee machine discussing weasels and when they asked me what my favorite weasel was, I blurted out Steppe Polecat. I don't even like Steppe Polecats! Honestly they look like little saber tooth tigers and they give me nightmares. Everyone rolled…

My father is at one of the Big Four, met my mum there and they seem to have been doing okay for the last thirty years but, then, he's not a braindead idiot, so I guess the two situations can't be compared.

What kind of maniac doesn't close a parenthesis?

He also photographed Obama, so if you are going to criticize the Kardashians you most certainly should criticize Obama.

Sometimes old white men say cute things.

I understand that this is not the point of this article but GIVE ME THAT MAKEUP.

$4000 or $2000: it really doesn't matter because spending more than fifty bucks is ridiculous.

I'm having trouble with less significant issues, but trouble nonetheless — like the cable company refusing to work with me when I call (despite my husband calling FOR me to put name on the account — and this doesn't make me feel like a helpless little wifey at all, oh no) because the account is under his last name, or…

I just endorse them as SeptemberGrrl HusbandsName and I've never had a problem.

Today I'm rocking the "first day off from furlough and can't be bothered to undo the matted tangles" ponytail.

I've had so many accidental soccer mom haircuts in my teenage years, even after providing pictures and descriptions and emphasizing things like edgy and not soccer mom-ish that leaving a salon feeling attractive and confident would be a godsend for me at this point. I actually started trimming my own hair and haven't…

I currently have a "get complimented by women and gay men on public transportation" pixie-style haircut that I LOVE.

Yeah, that bugged me too, although I didn't really want to go on a huge tangent about it in a "here's some art" post. One thing I like about Adventure Time is at least there are a number of female supporting characters, even if the main heroes are guys.