He frowns, then face-spritzes. I ask what the spray is, and he says, “It’s embarrassing for you that you don’t know.” (It is, according to the bottle, Evian Natural Mineral Water spray.)

And if anyone is proud Todd Aiken is gone, Huckabee and Steve King were very supportive of them so they gotta be ousted too.

There is such a thing as a good spray tan. My sister has them done occasionally before special occasions, and it’s very subtle and natural-looking.

Every time I read Scaramucci’s name I silently sing to myself “will you do the Fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning very, very frightening me.”

“Look. I like you. But you’re, like, a 4 out of 10. That’s not good enough to beat spicey’s ratings. Definitely not. So you need to get up to at least a 6 out of 10. Hit the gym, cut back on the McDees, tan every once and a while...you know. Actually care about your body and appearance. Unlike now. Where you obviously…

Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide,
No escape from reality

I just saw a large segment about this with Auntie Rachel, and it is truly a trip to Crazytown. Apparently, part of the problem is that the lawyers Cheeto Hitler was able to hire are not Washington constitutional scholars, since all of the big DC firms bounced him when his people came sniffing around looking for…

Trophy hunters might as well walk around with t-shirts on that say “I have a small penis and must overcompensate.”

Perfect +1 #allat&ttrucksmatter

At least the truck stood its ground...

And then he dabbed.

Ten days later, a former Thinx employee filed a sexual harassment complaint with the City of New York Commission on Human Rights, alleging that Agrawal groped her breasts, stripped in front of employees, discussed her sex life with them, and engaged in boundary-busting behavior like FaceTiming them while nude or on…

Thank you to everyone, including the haters,

Wait… I thought they were shooting a new season of Planet Earth. You aren’t supposed to interact with the wildlife.

The cruelty in those pictures is astounding. Everyone just stood around watching Christie instead of trying to save him by rolling him back into the ocean.

Chris Christie Hit With Ethics Complaint

Or is this just fantasy?

“Watched low rated @Morning_Joe for first time in long time. FAKE NEWS. He called me to stop a National Enquirer article. I said no! Bad show”

I’m not here to say I told you so. Except that I am.

C’mon how can they NOT make fun of Trumplethinskin’s Time cover?