Philly does a pretty good job of fucking itself.

What about the heady Aaron Rodgers?

One of the best things I’ve seen all year was Cam on some scramble with the field wide open, picking up about 25 yards and smiling like mad while he’s still running. Say what you want about him, the dude obviously just thinks football ought to be fun.

I know this guy who left his wife when she was pregnant, and I still want to slap the shit out of him nearly every time I see him. But then I remember I wouldn’t be married to her now and that kid wouldn’t be my son if her first husband wasn’t an asshole.

Florida deserves to keep the suck-ass Jags as punishment for the fate of the free world hanging on the votes on a bunch of 80-year-olds every four years.

Every time an owner wants a new stadium, the NFL trots out the economic impact numbers to extort the public for financing. But with these international games, aren’t they taking a home game away from the cities that ostensibly benefit from that game?

Jonny Gomes is a national treasure.

This is the kind of solid life advice I come here for. I definitely agree on not trying to blame it on a kid old enough to talk because he will inevitably scrunch up his nose and shout, “Uncle Tim pooted, mommy, Uncle Tim stinky.”

Hell yes. Sometimes my kids ask what kind of clothes I wore in high school. I point to my Oxford and say, “The same shit I’m wearing now, you hipster doofus.”

Untappd is stellar. What I need is an app that tells me what beers are on tap near me.

Imagine my disappointment when I found out this wasn’t a beer app.

I use whatever glass they’re giving away with a growler fill every Friday.

“A clock, a device often use to ascertain the time of day or to allow police officers such as yourselves to determine how much time you have left on your shift to harass 14-year-old boys who are smarter than you are.”

Sounds like everyone deserves to have at least one friend and mentor like Tommy in their life. Nice tribute.

Number 12 has been my go-to since 2002

Michelob was my first beer. I was about 16 years old in the back of a buddy’s Jeep in the first year of the Reagan administration. I’ll never forget that sort of grassy taste of a Michelob. I’d down a six-pack of it right now if I could find it. Ultra, though, Jesus Christ. My 270-pound brother-in-law drinks that shit…

I was a SAHD for four years before returning to full-time work. My situation was pretty easy because my old employer called me out of the blue just as I started looking for work and hired me back immediately. It was definitely weird being back, especially having to interact with adults all day again. In fact, that…

This kid is well primed to join me as a South Carolina Gamecocks fan.

All day, every day. It relieves me from having to lug a laptop around.

You forgot your #FSUTwitter