I couldn’t stop watching the face-palming (and laughing?) guy in the first video. He was visually disturbed (as we all were).

Solid assumption. Also, he is a dentist and I suspect that a (hopefully) small percentage of them are sadists. So, use your imagination on that.

If this were served on a bed of iceberg lettuce or encased in a jello mold I would be suspicious that it was copied out of one of my grandma’s retro cookbooks. What a terrible idea.

My grandparents. Pretty sure she was grabbing his ass. My grandpaw did the sexy nerd thing before it was cool.

I mean, I def would - but his voice was kind of Slingblade-ish, no?

So, important question: what is the correct alcohol/weed ratio? I have yet to figure this out and have typically tried to be a one or the other kind of gal. But, you know, some nights variety is good.

After my first husband and I were officially done (circa 2004), it was a race to grab all of our money. He emptied our bank accounts before I could get any money out and it really pissed me off. I am not really proud of myself, but I went on one of those “max out all of the credit card” binges. I picked up a carload…

This looks exactly like what my bff did to my 9th grade yearbook. We didn't even go to the same school.

The first thing I actually noticed in the video is that he kind of tries to...stroke her hair or something? Like in a sweet way? And she moves his hand off of her. Am I not seeing that? Am I crazy? What does it all mean?! Something, something, Illuminati. And then what does she say when she walks off? Just, “Madonna?”…

Oh, another opportunity to bitterly complain about my first husband – yay! Our very first fight was the beginning of our honeymoon. My friends had "decorated" his car with Just Married graffiti, random inflated condoms – as you do when people get married. We exited the church and walked to the car while our friends…

This is also one that I use regularly. An excellent choice! It gives the illusion that "Awww. I really wish I would have seen this text because I would have really loved to go."

"The dog just ate the crotch out of my last pair of clean pants." I may or may not have used this excuse and it may or may not have actually happened. Also, the pants were not actually clean they were just the least dirty/most passable to actually wear out. I am a disgusting person.

This is amazing.

That is possible! And the more I think of it...that makes sense actually.

This is amazing!

I think his mom was actually kind of afraid of him. Not to sound snotty, but it might have something to do with their...education? His mom didn't make it past 5th grade; his dad 3rd grade. He graduated from high school so he was a superior intellect in their eyes, I suppose. I have noooo idea why I married into that…

Thank you! And yes, I am - married five years to a guy that paints my toenails for me every week.

Wow you had someone do something similar? What is it with these people? I saw my ex brother in law's wife at a store one day and she ran up to me and said, "Hey! Do you remember me?? I am the only member of the family that doesn't hate you for ruining Kevin's life." Yes that's his real name. I'M CALLING HIM OUT!

Meh, I never fit in with them anyway - they were all VERY into redneck "culture" and I was/am not. He did me a favor, I just wish they would have filled me in so I could have moved on sooner. Also I forgot to mention that I had a miscarriage during his time with his new girlfriend. So very Maury Povich.

So true, so true - and beautifully put. I mean, I get trying to cover for your family and everything but if the situation was reversed I would definitely have said something. Or at least maybe one of his brother's wives could have said something.