Cameron Dallas, 4/10: “pulled a ‘Do you know who I am?!’”

I mean... you’re not wrong, but this is Dirt Bag, not the Slot. Or, like, CNN.

Holy shit, people, some good news!

Can someone, anyone, please isolate her in a hermetically sealed “panic room,” with triple-filtered purified oxygen, soft-rounded furnishings, and hands free state-of-the-art teleconferencing for four more months? Asking for 200 million friends.

Freedumb.

it was “a joy to help heal somebody,” although I wouldn’t necessarily describe bringing a much younger person into your relationship to mentor them, then pursuing a relationship with them after separating from your husband, as “healing.”

$20 says this post-natal abortion provider is anti-abortion.

Something something Late Registration?

“Swan-song Lake”

The theme was “Masquerade of the Red Death.”

nothing about kim kardashian’s life, or really any of their lives, inspires any envy in me. they seem boring and sad and too self-involved to actually be fun.

Filling our brains with useful information is boring. Don’t feel bad about putting a little trash in there, it will compost and make fertile ground for the good stuff.

I hate that I know this, but Kim’s bathroom has floor to ceiling glass walls and “the best lighting ever”.

good lord he’s been quarantined so long his hair is 2 feet long! at least he seems to be taking good care of it

I tried a standing desk for awhile and let me tell you, I can waste just as much time standing as sitting.

Hey is your husband single?

Cheer up. I see no screening for meetings with Miller, Kellyanne or...well, any of the Cabinet. Let’s not let Perfect be the enemy of Good.

I’ve never really understood why people thought Gwen Stefani was so amazing (though I was never a No Doubt fan). Shirley Manson is a cooler rock goddess in every way, and Garbage is a far superior band.

Ahem...

Where do I go to file charges against the assault on my eyes that has been perpetrated by the sight of these meth-addled, toothless, knuckle-dragging, ass-hair braiding examples of white supremacy?