I hope Carmelo Anthony drops 76 points on them in his home opener.

Jet Fool puts belt on real seams.

Hey all y’all who didn’t vote, here are the consequences of elections. Neil Gorsuch, implosion of one-sixth of the economy, pre-emptive war, indifference from DoJ to anyone not in power, and tax cuts for rich people are on the menu because of your inaction.

You won’t be tired for long. There will soon be a bright white-hot flash of light. After that, the ‘winning’ will stop for everyone.

Wilt’s involvement in trains is well documented

Wilt slept with 10,000 women...you can’t do that living in Philly.

He wanted a tenfold increase in nuclear weapons to ensure that any attack on the United States could be avenged sevenfold.

Why would he need to be health to watch the playoffs on TV?

Like, the sheer number of times he’s found an excuse to randomly throw in the word “doorhinge” just so he can pair it with “orange” is an exercise in straight-up silliness. It’s like some kind of petty beef with the nebulous linguistic powers-that-be. 😂

i thought the same thing.

Yeah. This makes no sense at all.

Eh, my dad’ll bring out the family ice cube bin (aka. a tupperware thing w/ one or two trays’ worth of ice) and pass it around at big holiday meals. It’s handy if you don’t have an ice machine in the fridge door.

Thank you. I thought I was crazy when I read this, as I have never heard of this before. If I am crazy, at least I know I am in good company with [checks OP’s name] oh for fuck’s sake.

“Having honest conversations” is usually followed by A remark about how *insert minority group here* are lazy moochers, criminals, stealing jobs, disrespectful, and/or ungrateful.

Exactly, so, it has come to this, (and frankly most deadspin readers/intelligent people have known this) if you support the NFL, you support systemic racism.

“Having honest conversations” is the new “starting a dialogue” and they can both fuck off forever.

Yeah, it would suck if football became divisive.

I also look forward to a synergistic and open discussion about core issues and in-season platforms with Roger Goodell and the NFL owners, in which I will begin dialogue by simply saying: Get bent, fuckers.