BRB laughing self into coma....

I had to read that 3 times because I thought my brain kept misreading condoms as lip gloss.

Flavored Lip Gloss leads straight to loose morals, obviously.

I am an EMT and I am asking myself the same questions. Hell, ‘hogtying’ is considered restraint. That’s actually illegal without a physician’s order. You can still hold it down on the stretcher but the hands must be free, and they have to be supine. (facing up). Unfortunately-for many cops/EMT’s there is an…

What the fuck is wrong with the EMT’s there? I don’t expect shit from the cops they’re amoral scumbags who have no care for the lives of the people unfortunate enough to cross their sociopathic paths. However, the EMT’s are medically trained. They know damn well about positional asphyxia why the fuck would they put…

Wouldn’t this one be on the paramedics though? I would imagine they should get there and be like, “Hey guys, glad you nabbed him, but this is a great way to strangle someone. Lets just strap him to this thing the normal way and save everyone the trouble.”

Oh my god.

They aren’t the first to be banned from China and they won’t be the last. The Government there is afraid of ideas and free thinking.

Have you tried sending a lorax?

“It was just a misunderstanding and once the movie is out will be cleared up.” Is an unwatched movie like a tree in the forest?

Tell me, has your neckbeard finally fused to your fedora?

I’m wondering if there’s a correlation between the selection of self-aggrandizing account names like “Brazen Clarity” and being an insufferable douche canoe. You may as well have just named yourself, “I Masturbate Whilst Reading My Own Posts”.

Pluto ain’t even a planet. Like, total D-list celestial body.

there’s plenty of room for all kinds of news on this here internet website

Yep. A story about Pluto belongs in a celebrity gossip feature called Dirt Bag.

Pluto is not a planet.

whats a planet

Everything is Justin Bieber’s fault.

I spent $40 on a serta memory foam dog bed this weekend and now my dogs have a nicer bed then I do. Of course they still sleep in mine. Such is life.