Well, if it were a popular vote contest, Hillary’s wacky gang of morons would probably have managed to lose that, too.

And yet Trump will be our next president. It’s almost like the US presidential elections aren’t as simple as the time you won the hall monitor position in fifth grade.

Lived the luxury life? What does that even mean?

Double negatives aren’t not confusing.

“A man” is setting yours sights pretty high, Emma. Have you considered a “journeyman?”

Pretty sure she most resembles the Durham Bull.

Lena Dunham? Leon Durham? Larry Doby?

So are internet comments questioning the physical status of professional athletes.

Everyone has a right to an opinion, but this does not change your employment status for those who are full time.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but it looks like they’re playing tonight’s game on what is Duke’s traditional home court for the first few rounds of the NCAA tournament

As a Jew, working on Christmas was awesome.

Am I supposed to be relieved by this? This man knowingly and willingly exposed his partners to a potentially life threatening disease without their consent. At least one contracted the disease.

My uncle says it meant reducing government spending.

Every government regulation that costs a ton of money to create and enforce has a fee simple workaround.

Rich people would transfer all assets to a spouse and then work for the government. Dumb idea.

I get being upset if it’s the team that’s up by 11 that tries the shot but to get your panties in a twist just because the losing team tries to make the score a little more respectable? Fuck off.

Asshole didn’t replace his divot.

“Golfing on ice is dangerous, that’s why I only play on snow.”

One in hole!

Since you’re too lazy to type more than one sentence, I have to assume you mean professionals who work with children. Women seeing their stylist for a perm and cut aren’t little babies, they’re adults. The last thing an abused woman needs is to be treated like a helpless child.