Are we secretly twins? Because this was literally my exact response.

I totally love dirty dirty whore sex.

Don’t feel like a dirty, dirty whore (at least not in a bad way). Some of the sex acts that I love are totally taboo and most people would find them gross.

Do you remember when sex was hot and a handy-J cost a penny-farthing?

“Because it’s a kilt, it has to be straight down,” he said, according to Smith. “It can’t flare out around your hips. It has to hang straight.”

There is a picture of my 14 year old boobs floating somewhere around North Jersey because once upon a time I was even dumber than I am now.

Important things to know, “Do you use recreational IV drugs? And or use dirty needles” “Do you use condoms?” “Do you currently have any STI’s or STD’s or other contagious diseases?”

I don’t think my boyfriend knows my number but, then again, he did seem pretty certain when he said that the number I said was probably wrong.

i dont even know how many sexual partners i’ve had. there are no clear guidelines on what constitutes “sleeping with someone”. if i make out with someone and we get to the point of heavy petting but we both pass out from too much champagne before we bother to find a condom, does that count? Or is it only PIV? oral?…

I’d tell him if I hadn’t lost count.

Even I don’t know how many partners I’ve slept with. Do people actually notch a bedpost or what?

I don’t tell my partner what I have for breakfast daily either, cuz that shit don’t matter.

Ok, honesty time. I couldn’t tell my partner how many people I’ve slept with because somewhere around my late 20s, I stopped counting. It’s not like it was so many that I couldn’t keep track, it just didn’t seem like important information to hold in my head.

I’ll introduce you to my oldest daughter, who was conceived when I was 21 and definitely not planning a pregnancy and on the pill, and which I took religiously at the same time every day. It wasn’t even a case of antibiotics or inconsistent timing - it’s just the fact that the pill is like 99% effective. Hey, my kid…

I know, right? Nobody (I’m looking at you, Dr. Miller) ever told me that you should take it pretty much at the same EXACT TIME every single day. I figured if I took one more or less within each 24 hour span, I’d be good to go. I do love him, though (my son, not Dr. Miller. Who was/is a she.)

My oldest kid should've been named OrthoTrycyclin Erythromycin, but he's a boy & that felt like a girls name...

People get pregnant while using birth control all the time. As sex educators always say “No method is 100% effective.”

This font size is appropriate imho