White Men Can’t Jump: My Brow-Furrowing Journey from Checkers to Chess

It’s worth pointing out that though the Chiefs winning 12 straight coin tosses has a 0.0244% chance (1 in 4096) of happening, the chances of any team winning 12 in a row is much higher — more like 0.78125%, or 1 in 128.​That’s rare enough to raise eyebrows, but not exactly the astronomical odds it seems like at first…

HELLO HAS ANYONE REMINDED YOU OF THE 2009 SAINTS YET?!?!

if by weird you mean “cripplingly sad,” Tom Brady has more victories in Buffalo than any Bills QB since 2001.

Oh. My. God. That one where a female journalist of color asked a question and HE PRETENDED HE COULDN’T UNDERSTAND HER ACCENT.

Why is everyone being so negative, we now have a comfortable majority in the House and can do whatever we want to reign in 45. We won a lot of races we expected to lose, cheer up.

Marathon, not a spring. Etc etc etc. I think people are just kind of coming down from the high realizing that now we have to 1) hold the House, 2) win the Senate, and 3) oust Trump in 2020. Get to work, people.

There is so much evil to fix and evil still holds the Senate and White House.

Ben is a Deadpin reader who likes chess.

“It happened in Seattle, it happened in Jacksonville, and it is happening on the Jets.”

You don’t know that.

Listen, I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you are a decent person who is competent in other areas of his/her life. However, I must tell you that you are in no way required to post comments on Deadspin blogs. If the best you can come up with is “I know there’s a joke somewhere around here, but I…

And were’s what Joe Theismann, then of ESPN, wrote about it:

Everyone at the game knew what he was doing the second he reached under that pad and they fucking loved it. It was a fun bit of fan service and the entire fox broadcast crew can be sewn together in a human centipede ouroboros and eat shit forever for all I care. 

The story also works with half the headline

I find it very helpful when people just flat out let me know they are a fucking liar by using the term “FAKE NEWS”.

Nick Mullens has lost the Raiders locker room.

I’ve got Tuesday in the pool for how long until we find out this kid tweeted something offensive in high school.

Just like Derek Carr cried when Erin Andrews sacked him in London.