Damn straight. I knew there was something that creeped me out about her, but I couldn’t quite figure out what it was. Now I know. I mean, why doesn’t she just cosy up to drug companies as well?

And people were getting judgmental when we called her an opportunist a few weeks ago.

It puts on the MAGA hat or it gets the hose.

Every mention of this fuckwad should include his multiple DUI that he skated on because of who is daddy is.

Fuck Matt Gaetz forever. 

His later unconfirmed statement:

It’s not 1962 anymore

The NRA seems like a 5hr energy crowd. 

Nero (self) diddled while Rome burned.

Early 80's era Philly PD is great at air dropping supplies on the roof.

“Cam Newton is waaaay overrated. Google his lifetime stats. 58.5% lifetime completion percentage”

Jerry Richardson seems like a man who would have organized the Battle Royal in Invisible Man.

Until Cam knocks up or assaults half of the greater Charlotte metro, he is neither Dwight nor Jameis. He might be a dipshit, but he’s not on those dudes’ level (yet, that I know of). 

I honestly started reading it assuming it was written to the players.

Biakabutuka. Man, I always remember thinking, “This is going to be his year.” Dude would break out a 50-yard run on one play, and then break his leg on the next play. Dude was more fragile than the leg lamp from A Christmas Story.

This is how I imagine Jerry Richardson sexual harrassment days, pre-internet.

“Return to Relevance" could also be the slogan for Nazis and other white supremacists since that orange turd won the election.

Cam has somehow become one of the easiest QBs to root for because I assume that every one of his TDs must have given at least 5 MAGA chuds an aneurysm

I know you’re being sarcastic, but your comment would pass for legitimate discussion among the Fox News website commenters.

So this is a list that basically details all the ways Republicans are abdicating their oversight responsibilities?  Cool. 

I’ve been stockpiling booze, Ben & Jerry’s, and Stormy Daniels videos in preparation for the inevitable November letdown.