This deserves way more stars.

I'll take it! Can I work from home?

Immediately after Fox cleaned out his office he was seen in the parking lot tongue kissing Jennifer Lawrence. TMZ is reporting that "Fox has 'traded up' and is moving on."

When Manning was asked to comment, he replied in perfect Nationwide cadence "Coach John Fox he just got canned."

Tebow? The game would still be going with all those Tebow squat breaks.

"All my money comes from ads."

Tebow would have torn his quad "Tebowing" or whatever that half-squat/curl thing he does is called.

Funny, when it came to Favre. I would think that even as he inched towards 40, he's just have to think of Jenn Sterger and have no problem shrugging it off.

"gobble gobble crunch crunch slurp."

Je suis Bills fan.

Channing Tatum, is that YOU?

I hate those fucking commercials. But you can do a lot with 7 syllables. "Papa Johns it tastes like shit" "Eli's got more rings than me." "I am just a whiny bitch." Next time the ad is on, put it on mute and make up your own lyrics! It's fun! And cathartic!

That is terrific.

"But, but Jerry paid for the ball! It's ours! He said so!"

The story is fantastic for this image alone "Other pictures show men in Hawaiian shirts and also a gang of Oompa Loompas throwing furniture."

So who is the new self-loathing Asian?

Well, think of this as a description of someone shitting into a urinal. But instead of literally shitting, they are just doing their job really poorly.