Shut up, you racist piece of shit. Your ridiculous tirades clarify nothing and frighten no one.

Shut up, you racist piece of shit. Your ridiculous tirades clarify nothing and frighten no one.

Shut up, you racist piece of shit. Your ridiculous tirades clarify nothing and frighten no one.

Shut up, you racist piece of shit. Your ridiculous tirades clarify nothing and frighten no one.

Ugh, I am so sorry! A co-worker told me the same thing. I guess it’s not 100%.

I wish there was one in New York. I would go in and walk through the restaurant pissing on the floor. (Looking older has its privileges, like claiming to be an incontinent old lady).

I prefer to punish manspreaders the old fashioned way - by sitting my fat ass next to them and slowly squeezing their legs back together through the awesome power of physics.

I volunteer.

OK. Let me help you get started on 13 of these:

Both at once, like a vortex of hotness? Or in series, like an old-fashioned pinball game?

Which fans? The racist ones? Because I don’t give a shit about them either.

There’s (supposedly) a biological reason for that - before their fontanel closed, that was the spot where you could get their scent the strongest. Reassuring the most animal part of you that your cub had not been replaced with another.

The fact that you admitted any of those things is sexy AF to me.

Wait, so if I’m a Christian and I’m appalled by this fuckery, I’m not supposed to register my distaste or distance myself and my faith from it?

In a world, where prosecco is running low, and brunches, have become a thing of the past...

Damn you. I spit in your general direction (but also, really want to have lunch with you).

The fuck is this shit? If moscato runs low, clear the damn streets of SoHo and the UWS, because I will straight-up start murdering folks.

That’s so funny! I have a t-shirt that says “Arsenic in the mustard or the mayo?”

If it was sufficient, she would have corrected her embarrassing error.

I’ma leave this rightcheah: http://on.cc.com/1qc5ODK