So they don’t do it because they’re dicks, they do it because they’re manipulative fuckers who want all your attention. Or because that class of water MIGHT turn into a mouse.

This is Archer, named after Sterling Archer. He, too, has been known to go on a rampage. He enjoys knocking over my small living room wastebasket. One day I was sitting on the couch and caught him in the act. I told him ‘No!’. He looked at me from those calm blue eyes, slowly reached out a paw, and knocked the…

Marry Jon Huntsman, fuck Sarah Palin, kill all three of these guys.

Fuck: myself :)
Marry: myself :/
Kill: All three then their chances for winning with a scandalous sex tape or five. M. Night Shyamalan twist: the tape is a circle jerk love fest that would make Liberce look straight.

You’ve got the order exactly right. I would hatefuck Rand Paul (all 5 feet of him) and watch those curls bounce, then go take some Plan B right in front of him. Jeb Bush is surprisingly the least disgusting of the bunch. Ted Cruz is definitely the most killable of the three choices.

Ok, but:

All of these are incorrect answers. The correct answers are John Waters and Carol Burnett.

I've always wondered if ghosts get frustrated when their places are occupied by boring, unimaginative people who don't really notice their mundane haunting activities and chalk it up to everyday coincidences. "Who left the light on in the attic again? Gotta fix that table so stuff doesn't roll off it any more. Dumb…

My aunt died recently, and several relatives including her daughter have heard her calling their names. My dad, the most skeptic “rational/logical” guy ever, who said at one point “the mind plays tricks on you when you’re grieving, it’s normal. You didn’t really hear her voice. That stuff is not real. People are…

I worked at a summer program once where there were kids (unrelated to each other) called India, China, Asia, Corea (pronounced Korea), and Tywon (pronounced Taiwan). Tywon hung out with Corea but apart from that they really all had nothing to do with each other.

No, her younger sister is named Basement Baby.

Blake Lively is not wrong. #HelenMirrenIStheSexiestWomanAlive

Chris Wallace is still an asshole, but that’s actually a decent apology in that it recognizes that the problem with what he said is not just that he called her fat, but that he brought her physical appearance up for no reason. So, he gets a couple points for that.

People who say this—I just shudder to think that they may have kids. And that they'll be really shocked that 11-year-olds (Sana's age at the beginning of the books) and teenagers tend to be, well, childish and sometimes bratty and not have the most perspective about things. Like, they do not tend to be adults. WEIRD I…

Secrets Secrets:

My husband thinks Syrio Forel, Arya's sword fighting instructor, was also Jaquen H'ghar. That he's her guardian/spirit guide. Thoughts?

As a longtime member of #TeamSansa, I'm eagerly awaiting all the Sansa haters to change their tune this season

<3 Sansa

I once had someone ask me and my friends to stop singing along at a Springsteen show.

OH GOD, HERE COMES A BOOK.