It’s a Derlint Flatulence Extractor.

As a professional hobo comber, I choose not to take offence at the comparison with cat shit picker-uppers.

The word “sporty” still means something. It just doesn’t mean what you want it to mean anymore.

How’s this?

Canadian hillbillies.

A French Onion Soup Injection system would only increase (my) harmful emissions.

“Hey, let’s make shit up and put it on the Internet!” - Vox

Why does it look like a 2009 Dodge Caliber SRT4 with more...ugly bits?

Damn I hate sales douchebags like these guys. Before my wife and I bought our new car I downloaded and read through the owner’s manual. When we went in to pick up the car our sales guy wasn’t there; he’d called in sick. The replacement dude who “helped” us was a “Hey now!” douche pontoon. A stereotypical sales guy.…

I’ve always wanted a Flord Flersion Turdbo just like that one.

Russia is a demonstration of what would happen if drunk brodudes (with guns) ran the world.

Our ‘77 Volare Premier sedan had a 318 2bbl — and the stock engine was blue.

I’d rather have an non-Camino’d ‘85 Chrysler 5th Avenue.

I love stabaphores, too.

Gas jumped from 64.4 cents a litre to 72.9 cents a litre this morning, in the Canadian city where I am today. This was within an hour of the rumour of reduced oil production making the news.

I’ve never been out of the grey since we all got Kinja’d.

And can someone un-grey me? Please?

I didn’t think the Singularity would start this way...

Hey, Honda. Hi. Honda, what happened? I want to know. What the hell happened? You mixed dinosaur and amphibian DNA, didn’t you? And then you threw in some Transformers and some first-gen Hyundai Tiburon curves and some Robocop helmet on acid and possibly some kind of origami Satan ass boils. Didn’t you? Or are you on…