I thought I had expendable income, and then I looked at a $300 bag as a gift idea and realized I’m poor.

Once I was in the loo at the airport and I farted. A woman in another stall said loudly, “That’s disgusting! Who did that?”. I laughed so hard that I farted again and she declared, “I do not have to listen to this!” and stormed out.

Predictions:

No respect for black lives. They will keep doing because they know white people in a jury will never convict them. The same PD in the same city took this knife wielding white man alive, after three hours but she was shot on sight. Amerikkka indeed.

What are the odds she’s dating Kushner because of the K?

I can’t deal with sticky kid hands. Just thinking about it grosses me out and I regret watching this video.

A Canadian was drunk at a hockey game, stop the presses!

I wonder what organization he is strongly affiliated with that worships him and likely makes him believe he can do no wrong? Can’t put my finger on it.....

Does Barron’s t-shirt indicate he has been offered a position as advisor?

Christ, it’s like commenting on the Daily Mail. For the record, as a parent, you want to keep your boners away from your children.

Probably sad but the only thing I know Patti Lupone from is Life Goes On.

The whip is the congressperson responsible for persuading and keeping score of votes. At least that’s what House of Cards and The West Wing have taught me.

I think he looks like Mac from Always Sunny was the victim of a prank out back of a hair salon

Is... is he wearing a bump it?

Based on that pic I will refer to him as Clairol Shag Mullett and nothing else.

Please, she had one of those and she still couldn’t show up. IT TOOK PLACE IN HER HOME AND SHE STILL COULDN’T MANAGE TO DO HER JOB. Enough with giving this loser chances.

WTF is the point of being teetotal if your face still ends up looking like you drink a fifth a day?

Wait, Tim and Tyne Daly are siblings?!?! Whaat?!?!?