Paul Ryan.

Fuck, I hate it when I learn about major news stories here.

This is why we can't have nice things.

Obligatory reposting of Danzig getting knocked out.

You can't beat the "All You Can Beat" deal.

More? You're already well-known at every rest stop on I-81 from Winchester to Bristol.

I can't even get off anymore without applying a scrambled cable TV filter to my porn.

How they get it on the ceiling?!?!?

I really hate it when I'm done before the opening credits.

Somehow, I suspect there might be some economic motivation here. I wonder how many viewings were "accidental" and removed from guests' bills at checkout.

Glad to see you writing for the AVC again, Steve. I was getting worried that Tommy Wiseau had scared you off.

I think the only MtG card I kept (I quit around when revised started) is Demonic Attorney: If opponent doesn't concede immediately, both players add 1 card to the ante.

Besides, without Cannonball Run we would never of gotten Death Race 2000.

Default, the two sweetest words in the English language!

He thought he'd get his money for nothing and his chicks for free. Instead, @JohnTeti:disqus found himself in dire straits.

AV Club commenters returned the car because they can't afford the taxes/title/plates.

Finally! The final step towards social justice achieved!

I'm imagining a Jean Teasdale type.

You might be saved! Another site suggested it might be Finn Witrock.

Look closer! Faceless guy is Matt Bomer!