Sometimes I let him out in courtyard of my building, but not after dark. After dark he gets brave and I’m afraid someone’s going to take him home or he’s going to get hit by a car.

His movements do look intentional, and seem to line up pretty well with changes in the music. If it’s faked, it’s choreographed really well. I was gonna say that I’m surprised he can operate that turntable so well, but then I’m reminded of all the toddlers I see navigating iPads with no problem at all.

I just don’t understand the need for biopics of people who lived and died, like, three years ago. We already know Steve Jobs’ story. This would be much more interesting as a film like 50 years from now when we all have iBrain implants. Some retrospective insight about the dawn of a new era of internet and computer…

I understand this, but the truth is that someone having older parents is not a guarantee they’ll be lost earlier. People die all the time—my father died in his early fifties (and I was nineteen). It can happen earlier—and it will happen inevitably no matter how you slice it. It’s not great, but it’s reality.

see this kind of story is why I lose my mind if my period’s two weeks late even though I haven’t seen a dick in a year

Are ... are potatoes a race now? I might be part potato. At least my nose.

Stages of me attempting to watch this, illustrated by Prince:

I just don’t understand how she hasn’t been in bed under like 4 comforters since this happened. How is she not mortified? I wish I could watch this video, I hate work.

Yup. That’s me in the red bandana. When I sneeze, glitter comes out.

This looks awesome. Germany has owned this terrible history and taught it in their schools to make sure it never happens again. Germany has done a better job than most countries, really. America hasn’t taught and owned the terrible history of slavery and native genocide with the completeness that Germany has.

“Zola goes to Florida, and what follows is—well, you know that part of Their Eyes Were Watching God where Tea Cake gets rabies”

twitter is like 90% only good for things like zola

Future HOA board members, obviously.

What if Glenn is rescued....

Why did you put a dead rat in your wall?

I mean it’s ONE banana, Michael. What could it cost, ten dollars?

RIGHT? Like don’t you think the other protesters would be like “hey man, so we already look pretty bad, but you push us over the edge. plz donate and pray for us, but maybe don’t show your face at events, k? god’s blessings.”

Definitely the energy is turned down, but the writing is the same. I actually like it; sometimes Stewart’s intensity was a bit overwhelming for me.