sometimes she’s horny. that’s three. three dimensions.

YAS!!!!

The only theory I’m on board with is that Bernard is a host.

You know what, it’s quite plausible that she’s devastated at the thought of not having her dad in her life

WHAT does she think a monster is!?!

This poor, poor little girl. You know what, it’s quite plausible that she’s devastated at the thought of not having her dad in her life - abuse within families is as complicated as it is horrific, and it could not be clearer that the adults in her life are encouraging her feelings of loss and guilt, rather than those…

He is not a monster, just a man that really screwed up and has been paying in many ways.”

I recently empowered my female dog to not barf her expensive prescription food all over the kitchen floor. She embraced the empowerment and barfed outside.

Ah... the pretentiousness of 3rd party voters. I basically got told to shut up by an American friend because I told him it was a throwaway to vote 3rd party, I know nothing about American politics. This, coming from a guy who kept posting stupid memes on my wall during the last Canadian election.

“He was only here for about nine weeks”

I might be a little late considering the 804 comments ahead of me but...

A few years ago, my then-3 year old had a fever which I was treating with baby Tylenol. I gave him his dose before bed, got distracted and walked into his room to see him holding the medicine bottle in one hand and the dropper in the other saying “I give myself a medicine!!”

Here’s a fresh one from summer 2016.

When I was about twelve, I went snooping through a closet and found photos of a little girl that looked like me, but seemed to have been taken a good 10 years earlier. I took the box to my mom, who told me that we would talk about it later, and to go outside to play. When I brought the pictures up later, she denied I…

I have three, all having to do with the house I grew up in.

My husband and I bought our house about four years ago. We knew at the time that the former owner died in the house, but it didn’t really bother us, as we’re not the type to believe in spiritual things.

I housesat for my best friend’s parents (who were like my second parents) before I moved out west. It was a pretty sweet deal: I took care of their three dogs, two cats, and bird and got the run of a four-story farm house style surbabn pad with a pool and 80 inch HDTV.

Back story: My mom is English and didn’t move to America until she and my dad married when they were 21. When she was 16 and still living in England, there was one particular night that scared the mess out of her. My grandmother (mom’s mom) had been at a friend’s house that night and played with a Ouija board. My…

Every goddamn year, I open this story LIKE A SUCKER while I’m on the toilet pooping. And now I’m afraid to move.

Gonna share some fun ones from my childhood home.