The songs and adoration of my people

A few months ago at our local Cracker Barrel, my wife took her earrings off and left them on the table when we left. (Disclaimer: This was all totally her fault.) We don’t live far away so I had to rush back to see if they were still there. Of course they weren’t because women are going insane over garbage Kendra…

Watching this with volume off because I’m at work, but somebody please tell me that she has that scratchy, life-long-smoker voice.

I once ate two Whataburger Honey BBQ Chicken Strip Sandwiches in one sitting when I was in college, but I was also fat on my way to getting fatter and largely inactive. Now I’m old and exercise and diet and life sucks. I lost 90 pounds but life sucks.

You will also have butt problems.

[Insert mundane car here] breaks the Nurburgring lap record for [mundane car class] on a Wednesday afternoon in a light drizzle when the temperature doesn’t get above 80 degrees and Herr Schmitzheimer is seen standing on his porch waving a dead chicken at the passing cars.

I love a cheap beater Corvette as much as the next guy, but this thing looks like a nightmare waiting to happen. Get the pocket book out, Delores.

Best. Racing game. Ever.

Really looking forward to reading about this build. Should be a monster.

I mean who doesn’t wear full leathers and a helmet in your sim MotoGP rig?

I’m sure it’s nothing compared to other comments, but I walked out of two dealerships on the same day after they didn’t honor promotions that we allegedly qualified for when they spoke to us on the phone. Of course we didn’t qualify once we were there and maybe we should take a look at this cheaper car over here.

Hey have you ever heard about the ultimate ground speed check?

Jason, you simply need to have faith in the Factory. Do not question the Factory’s ability to create. It has proven it can create and who are we to ask how it creates? The Factory bestows its blessings upon the cars of Cars. Let us simply be happy to live and worship the almighty and all-knowing Factory. It is our…

I’m not a big food show watcher and never was a Ramsay fan, but his Twitter gimmick of dumping on people’s food was funny... for a few days. The jokes were always the same and people started sending him the most ridiculous things they could just to get a response. Probably the shortest I’ve ever followed a celebrity…

I’ve started to see this in the growing BBQ craze. Pit masters and smokers are reaching celebrity status. Then they go to these festivals in NYC or LA or Las Vegas and they cook up these wild BBQ-inspired things that will never be on their actual menu (because there are 1,000 people in line at 4 a.m. on a Saturday…

I don’t think anybody proofread any of this.

After all the other gymnastics stories on here, I expected this to be some sort of abuse news about Georgia. No, it’s just an overly complicated piece about Georgia hiring a new coach... that takes four paragraphs to say who that is.

JFC those first two paragraphs could be worded better. Who was fired by who in what year because they didn’t do what when and who replaced them that was also fired for not doing what because why?

Ah good. Seems everything is going well there.

The map wasn’t there when this was first published.