What is a fist husband? Sounds dirty. ;)

JFC.

THIS SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME. On my way to a blind date. Except the bird got caught in my windshield, I had to pull over because the whole entire windshield was cracked and I couldn’t see out of it (plus the seagull was SCREAMING). I tried to pull it out with my hands and tore its body in half, there was blood…

Or “fanks”

Huge kudos to James Corden for breaking out some solid harmony with FREAKING ADELE. I can carry a tune, but I think if I attempted to harmonize under that kind of pressure, she’d just give me a kind, “Shhhh.... just no, luv. Tanks.”

I hate that I’m old enough for people I consider legends to start dying. I’m so wrung out from Bowie’s passing that the suckerpunch that is losing Alan Rickman has knocked me flat.

Are you accusing Jimmy Fallon of starting the Rwandan genocide? I mean, sure, we all know he’s a monster, but you think he’s that bad?

“Uganda get yourself fired, Jimmy."

It would be excellent to have more information about consent and sexual assault for children and teenagers.

Sorry. I didn’t mean for that to come off as rude. I’ve just taken quite a beating here the past few days. BFE = Bumfuck, Egypt aka the middle of nowhere. In other words, this story is local for me and I have been watching it minute by minute. Anyway, thank you for trying to be supportive.

Yeah, I remember that. I had never considered previously whether or not I respected Mick Jagger - he was a fact of life, like air or gravity. When he pulled that on Jerry, it occurred to me for the first time that this was a person, someone I could dislike and hold in low esteem. And that I did dislike him and hold…

Yeah, I think it’s pretty awesome that he didn’t allow Gibson to waltz on the stage like all was forgotten. And I feel like he took it far enough to be more than just the obligatory gentle rap on the knuckles to make everyone feel like they’re not turning a blind eye to his offensive behavior when they actually are. I…

Gervais just ended the show by saying ’From me and Mel Gibson ‘Shalom!’

Yeah, they didn’t “yuck it up like a couple of old racists”, he pretended to do that so that he could deliver the line. The entire point of that bit was that he wasn’t sorry at all and he actually doubled down on the idea that Gibson is a piece of shit. There’s a lot to hate Gervais for, but this is isn’t it. As you…

I find your assessment of Ricky Gervais to be offensively bad.

Not really getting where the hate for Gervais is coming from. To me he remains a great example of the comedian who always punches up and never punches down.

See, this is why we should put a stop to science.

You say that but you probably haven’t considered every issue. For instance, would it be okay to race them?

somebody put that man’s hand in a tiramisu, cuz those are some fucking ladyfingers.