A few weeks ago, my extremely moody and snotty-ass 13-year-old was giving me the usual bullshit as I was asking her to put on her seatbelt (all the while, refusing to put on her seatbelt). I was just wrecked from everything, my job, the election, you name it, and I leaned over and screamed, “Put on your mother-fucking…

The Warriors are such hypocrites. Showboating millennial takes off work early two days in a row, and no one bats an eye.

LeBron calling out Chuck, Le’Veon Bell released a diss track against Skip Bayless. Is 2017 the year that Athlete’s finally put professional Hot Take Artists in their place?

No no no, this is when Barkley doubles down. He always doubles down. They don’t call him the Round Mound of Rebound for nothing. He’s gonna be right back up. If you’re going to get into a spat with a man who literally threw a guy through a window, prepare to feel the pane.

I spent the weekend in horror, rage, shame and yes pride. If my government disgusts me, my fellow citizens (well most of them) fill me with hope.

WTF? This professor had the nerve to repeat this bullshit about how this case ruined her life?

We’re done here.

This is the first time that Pachulia has knocked down anything that far from the hoop.

Cowboys Executive: The way it works is we get ourselves in a good position and we don’t make a move again until it’s over. Got it?

INVISIBLE PENIS AND BALLS!

Ok not to nitpick or anything, but the forearm tattoo(s) are in reference to Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. “Too weird to live” on right arm, “Too rare to die” on left arm.

I think it was when the Rams upset the Seahawks, the announcers were talking about how Goff hasn’t taken a snap under center or called a play since middle school. Pretty crazy to pick a guy #1 that hasn’t taken a snap under center or called a play for 10 years.

You mention Derek Carr but the most obvious counterargument to early starting is probably his brother David Carr, who was a well paid tackling dummy.

There’s cases for both sides. Derek Carr started almost immediately and nearly went winless in his first season. That experience ended up being crucial in getting him to the point where he is today - he speaks a lot about the game having ‘slowed down’ this year. Other examples - Eli was thrown in after 7 games of Kurt…

Is this “Let’s forget some guys!”

On the bright side, they missed out on this election too

Just before the final out, my 95 year old grampa, veteran of two wars, cancer survivor, and long-suffering cubs fan, pulled me aside and, with a tear forming in his steel grey eyes, said, “The blacks ruined this neighborhood and your sister dresses like a whore.” This was for him.

Probably the worst use of this meme I’ve ever seen in my life

Of course they can take a joke. Hell, they’re voting for one.