You write for Deadspin.

Your last paragraph is just plain beautiful.

I guess now we know why the game was delayed.

“Adam, now, is fresh, he smells good, he’s clean.”

The conveyor hole.

What was your reason to have kids?

I’m laughing so hard right now :’D. EEEW!, but funny.

Wonder if they could sync the LEDs to your movement and make it appear like you’re motionless.

I stopped watching for the same reason. After awhile, it became so distracting, I just couldn’t listen to him talk anymore, nuclear or not. Someone should’ve told him during production.

Saw this a few days ago. The cigar is so obvious, I’m surprised it’s the point of this illusion. I thought that maybe the picture was flipped on its side and that we were really looking at a cigar stuck in the floor.

Looks like someone wants metal fingers in their body...

The earth is exactly 3 million years old.

Is this Zack Snyder’s true form?

I don’t want to repeat myself. I’ve coined a phrase for you guys: first world enthusiasts. The Internet is a wonderful kindergarten...

Thanks.

Fair point. To people who pre-ordered it, was there a window of delivery given, or an exact date? I still think it’s reasonable to give them a little bit more time that this. Who knows what the exact pre-order numbers were. And it’s not like they can afford not to deliver them.

It’s been, what, four days? And they’ve got how many hundreds of thousands of these going out? A few entitled children making a ruckus again...

I spend the better part of my workday on the hunt for good celebrity gossip...

More like Luke Spelunkyt, riiiiiight?